We had Max, a substitute skipper, join us for the day to help out the wildly hurting Ben. We were now a party of 8.
We docked in a secluded bay and lounged a bit before jumping in the water. Suddenly, I heard Donal and Erika laughing as they were looking over the side and pointing at the water.
Donal: “Uh, guys, not sure if you want to see this but, it looks like there’s a turd in the water.”
Sure enough, there it was. A turd nugget, just floating past without a care in the world. One of the guys grabbed a paddle, picked up the turd with it, and flung it far into the distance.
“How do we know that it won’t come floating back?”
“I think I flung it far enough.”
Within the next hour or so, two more turd nuggets came floating past. I figured with all the salt in the seawater, it should be a somewhat disinfected territory, right?
Lunch was served. On one of the very first days, Ben had made a salad dressing in a small jar and handed it over to me for my salad mixing duties. I poured the whole damn thing into the bowl, not realizing that it would be too much. It became a nice oil & vinegar cocktail with a lettuce and veggie garnish, and I was teased for it every lunch after that.
“Hey, Christine, looks like you managed to make a good salad this time!”
Paddle boarding and tube lounging came afterwards. Since it was the end of the season, the weather was on the chillier side and Erika usually kept to the boat, wearing a robe and sitting in the sun. At one rare point, Erika was standing by the edge without her robe and Lottie saw an opportunity and took it. She proceeded to wrap her arms around Erika and after a bit of a struggle and some “Noooo!” she jumped off and dragged her into the water with her. It was only afterwards that Lottie became slightly scared of what Erika might say/do.
Erika, laughing: “Oh, the water is not as cold as I thought…but still cold.”
Sigh of relief.
Then came the GoPro shenanigans. The guys placed their GoPros at the very bottom using weights and filmed themselves jumping into the water. We then had the genius idea of all diving down, placing ourselves in a circle and taking a group photo down under. Cue in chaotic swimming from all 8 of us. Some managed to swim down, some kept floating up. Arms and legs were flailing everywhere without any order. But, hey, we got some sort of group something on that GoPro.
A previous passenger had made Ben a nice pair of Speedos, proudly ironed on with “Skipper.” During the majority of his employment with MedSailors, he wore knee length board shorts and while the rest of him was nicely tanned, his thighs had been clearly deprived as a result.
Ben: “Let’s take out these great whites,” as he slapped his thighs.
He then took out the paddle board and impressed us with this number. (Photo courtesy of Donal.)
Back in Šolta, we docked in Stomorska for the night. As we passed the other docked yachts, I saw a lady on one of them, holding her baby butt naked over the water. The baby then released a few surprises. Possible source of the turd nuggets – traced.
The skippers then threw us another white and red (red still tasted better) punch party, during which a dog came up to me, nuzzled my legs in a catlike manner, then lifted a leg. I managed to back off but not before I got hit with a few sprinkles. Don’t know what you’re thinking doggie but, I ain’t your territory.
We docked in Milna bay for our last night and celebrated in style with a nice buffet, a sometimes good and sometimes bad playlist blasting on the speakers and, what else but more drinks.
At one point, we all began to talk about our plans for after the trip. Some of us were staying in Split while the rest of us were either transferring to Dubrovnik or flying out altogether.
Donal: “Oh! If you stay in Split, make sure to go to this steakhouse that I went to. Probably the best steak I’ve ever had. Club…something. Chop Club?”
Erika: “CHOPS GRILL! Not CLUB!” as she broke down laughing.
Donal: “Yea, that.”
The next day, Donal reminded us yet again about “Chop Club.”
“IT’S CHOPS GRILL!”
It was also the night before my birthday and I was surprised with not just a slice of cake, but lap dances and slut drops from 1 Brit and 2 Kiwis decked out in lederhosen. That would be Rob, Dale and Rich, respectively. (Photo courtesy of Donal.)
As the night was winding down, Lottie and Kara decided to go for a skinny dip. I was in the midst of backing out when out of nowhere, these 2 old Germans decided to join them. I backed out for good. The guys (the Brit and Kiwis trio) decided to be assholes, however, and stole the girls’ clothes. A few minutes of death stares later, the trio returned with towels for them.
The next morning, I was woken up with a song blasting on the speakers. “Happy birthdayyy, happy birthdayyy, happy birthday Christineeee,” as the skippers came out with a doughnut and bottle of sparkling wine.
Me: “How’d you get my name in that song?”
Ben: “We called the radio station especially for you.”
A nice group photo to end the entry. Another epic trip coming to an end.
Donal: “So, make sure you go to that steakhouse! Club…Club…”
Erika: “CHOPS GRILL!”